That Stupid New Year's Post That Everyone (Including Me Now) Makes

In true Sprouls fashion, I have decided to jump on the New Year's  Resolution Bandwagon 12 days after the New Year and 8 days after everyone really cares to know about it stopped caring to know about it.

Also, in true Sprouls fashion, I've made the title of this post the length of your average Harry Potter novel.  But that doesn't matter.  What matters is that I've made a couple important resolutions that actually will be affecting this blog (not counting the obvious one to try and post and keep in touch with you guys more than seven times a year), as well as a few personal ones that I am debating having written in large letters on my wall, Animal Farm-style (although I might become a piggy leader of oppression, and that's just taking this whole massive ego thing WAAAAAAY too far).

So here is my generic New Years Resolutions blog post.

My first resolution was a pretty simple one, and even simpler now due to circumstances.  Through a goofy little turn of events, I am the only person living in a dorm room built for two.  And before you asked, yes, I already celebrated that by playing air guitar to loud music in my underwear.

It was liberating.

But the point is, my first big resolution was to start writing again.  And I'm not just talking about my blog.  AND I'M NOT GONNA START WRITING DOUCHEBAG DARREL AGAIN (any time soon) SO YOU ALL CAN JUST STOP ASKING ME.  I used to really enjoy writing stories, songs, and the like.  One of the reasons I've stopped writing that much is this blog and the fact that I like to write in private.  And especially as now this blog has become a lot better than just some angsty high schooler drawling on about how mediocre his life is (it's become some less angry college kid drawling on about how mediocre his life is).

Actually, now that I think about it, taking this blog a bit more seriously is something I've wanted to do for a while.  Sure, I'll still say a bunch of stupid and silly things, but I think it'd be refreshing to hear stories and stuff that have actual substance, too, as the occasional blog post I write that has substance usually goes down exceedingly well.  And with the practice of writing, as well as the creative writing class I am taking this semester will help me write a couple stories that I've wanted to put on this blog for years.

But in case you think I'm losing my touch, here's something to assure you I am the same person.

Have you heard about the band 1020 MB? Of course not they haven't had a gig yet

ALRIGHT RESOLUTION NUMBER TWO.  This fits under the stereotypical "be healthier" resolution, but it isn't to hit the gym more often, because let's face it, going outside is for dumb people who do dumb things like look attractive.  No, I thought of a much easier one.  To cut out candy and...here's the big one.  Pop.

Or soda.

Or soda pop.

Coke?

Carbonated beverages?  Fizzy Lifting Drinks? I hate slang sometimes.  Either way, I'm done with them. I wasn't originally planning on quitting them entirely, but I figured that it would be a good idea to not ingest as much sugar and stuff.

And it has nothing to do with my dad the dentist finding nine cavities in my mouth over break.  I promise.

As for candy, well, it turns out it's hard to eat sugar when there are holes in your mouth.  NO I MEAN I JUST HAVE LOST INTEREST IN EATING SUGARY SNACKS

...

You can see right through me, can't you?  I'm just gonna drop this and go to the third resolution, which is in the same snooty and better-than-you attitude as the first resolution.  What is it?  I plan to read more, ideally two books a month.

They don't have to be all literaturey, nor do I need to sit in a Starbucks in a cardigan and scarf, sipping frilly coffee beverages I can't pronounce, and wearing glasses with frames thicker and boxier than the Sears Tower.

Although my first book was written by Albert Camus...so maybe I could just whip up some coffee and drink it in the security of my dorm room, where no one will be able to judge me except my posters.  See?  Already got my ironic mug, too! 

I call it the Pug Mug.

And because, like most greedy Hollywood Directors seem to think, four is better than three (LOOKIN AT YOU, HUNGER GAMES MOVIES), I have a fourth resolution, and you guys are going to like this one a lot, I promise.

Remember last post, when I said I had a tumblr for my illustrations?  No?  Well then read my posts, I spend a lot of time on them, and it hurts my heart that you don't read them.  But either way, I have a tumblr for my artwork now.  The link is right here.  

My resolution is to post to that tumblr with a new cartoon/illustration twice weekly now that I'm back up here in Michigan doing things with my life.  I ALREADY HAVE TWO COLORED INKWASHES POSTED THERE THAT I HAVEN'T POSTED ON THIS SITE, SO IF THAT'S NOT INCENTIVE, YOU'RE PROBABLY THE WORST TYPE OF PERSON.

Possible fifth resolution: learn how to effectively advertise.