How to Beat Calculus

So I have a math paper.

But don't worry, it's not that bad.  I was only given the results from gold medal winners of the High Jump in every Olympics ever, only to create an equation so that I can guess with some degree of accuracy how the high jumpers would have fared in 1940 and 1944, had the Olympics been held that year.  Also, I have to predict the scores of the High jump in 2016.

Because CLEARLY, the 2012 Olympics are not that important to IB project makers.

What's IB, you say?  Well, my personal definition of it is "Hell in High School," but I'm really kind of jaded towards the thought process that it could be possible that doing incredibly advanced classes will truly make you better and get to skip a year in college even though most colleges in America fail to recognize the program.

Take that, AP test system.


Anyway, I was dumb enough to take a few IB courses this year, and even though I'm not in the highest level of Calculus at the school (Although still pretty damned close), I am convinced that it will be the death of me.

But, because I'm a genius, I came up with my own little cheat sheet, which I typed up on my own when I should have been collecting data.  I know, I know, I'm so good at giving myself appropriate time to do this kind of stuff.

So here it is, unabridged.

WHAT THE HELL YOU NEED TO DO FOR THIS PROJECT

Step 1:  Plot down all the important points (good job, you actually did it.)

Step 2:  Make three…count ‘em…three graphs.

Graph 1:  The data that you were given (wow, two in a row?  You’re on fire.)
Graph 2:  Same data with the line of best fit that YOU came up with.
                               
HOW TO DO THAT:

a.  linear
             1.  Get the average of x and y values
             2.  Equation to find slope is: 

             3.  S is for standard deviation.
b.  power curve
             1.  Plot the points (X,Y) as points (log X, log Y) for each data point
             2.  Equation of line is Y = mX + k
                           log Y = m log X + k
             3.  Convert to give y as a function of x.
                 
c.  exponential curve

1.  Data points should be (X, log Y)
2.  Fit a least-squares line
3.  Convert the equation in step 2 to give Y as a function of X.
Graph 3:  Let the computer do it (Good job, do all the easy work first.  Idiot.)

Step 3:  Congratulations, you did it.  Now solve for 1984 and 2016.

Step 4:  Talk about how amazing your model curve is.  Or don’t.  It probably will suck, knowing your luck.

Step 5:  Solve for 1940 and 1944, because you should be proud that you can guess jumps and stuff.

Step 6:  BUT WAIT:  THERE’S MORE!  Add the NEW numbers to your list and redo EVERYTHING    (Thanks, IB) to see much more accurate results.  Hooray.

Step 7:  Discuss the overall trend in people who like to jump and how high they are jumping.

Step 8:  Go on Facebook and take a break.  You freakin’ deserved it.

Step 9:  Repeat step 8 as many times as necessary until you realize that it’s due the next day and you have no time left to do it.

Step 10:  Write the paper at midnight because sleep is for the weak.

Step 11:  Discuss any modifications that should be made to your data.

Step 12:  Make it all look pretty and turn it in to your teacher, masking your sheer terror of calculus with a vigorous energy for learning.  Rejoice in your four-day weekend.

See how I made it a 12-step plan?

DAMN, my genius just knows no bounds.

And those notes are my little way of encouraging myself.

By...uh...NOT encouraging myself.

Yeah.

Best thing?  It is due after previously mentioned four day weekend.  Looks like step 8 can be repeated quite a lot.

Better friend some more people:  I don't want to be bored.